After waking up on Sunday and leaving Jamie a super sweet voicemail that went something like "Jamie, wake the fuck up, it's 10:30, i'm bored as shit and need to get out of the house. beach! beach! beach! call me back slut", and her finally calling me back, we decided it was far too cloudy the beach. "What do you want to do then?" I asked as i checked newsday.com....Seafood festival? no. Train tradeshow? nah. Horse drawn carriage exhibit? hale no. This is when Jamie was all "wanna go to the Hamptons?" to which i replied "duh! gotta go to att (for my phone which is totally messed up) & get gas, be at your house in 1/2 hour". On the way there we had to decide which part of the Hamptons we'd go to. We go to west hampton all the time & thought if we went, there was for a real chance we'd wind up at boardy barn, drunk and asleep in my car. So in order to resist temptation & do a lil shopping, we went to Southampton.
As we were getting into town we passed the Lobster Inn. It looked so cute and we were hungry & put me in the mood for lobster. Jamie suggested we go a lil but farther in to town to see if there were anymore lobstah places. Long story short, there wasn't & on the way back to the lobster inn, some douche in a Bentley that followed me for a couple o lights, honked his horn if i didn't step on the gas as soon as the light turned green. Being an expert in road games, at the 4th light i didn't move, screamed, gave him the finger & proceeded to drive 5 miles per hour until he learned his lesson.
We were sat on the lovely screened in porch at the back of the restaurant that over looked this river? is it a river? i think it was too big to be a creek, and there were lobster traps in the water...perhaps it was an inlet? Either way, it was beautiful & so nice to look at and a relaxing atmosphere to crack open a lobster & eat some bisque. 
That was until the kids showed up....these bratty little kids started running around the joint screaming at the top of their lungs. I started to block it out until it became blood curdling, when all of a sudden an old man that was seated diagonally across from us SCREAMS "QUIETTTTTTTTTTT! SOMEBODY SHUT THOSE KIDS UP". This threw everyone off guard. The mother of the kids was all "sir, i'm trying to control them". Gramps was like "yada yada yada" when all of a sudden another dude comes in , takes the bill that he's got in his hand that's in one of those bill holder things, and smacks the old man in the back of the head. This guy starts screaming "HEY! THOSE ARE MY KIDS! DON'T YOU EVER TALK TO THEM THAT WAY AGAIN! ILL THROW ALL OF YOU IN THE WATER RIGHT NOW! IM NOT SCARED!". Well, Gramps is just sitting there flabbergasted not knowing how to react, so his friend Uncle Milty, takes his 3 pronged cane & starts shoving at the dad when a waiter finally came in & broke it up. IT WAS INSANE. Never in my life have i seen such events take place. And that was basically it...everyone eventually calmed down, we finished our meal & walked around town - where i'm pretty sure i saw Paris' mom - mrs. kathy hilton.
I got home after a 2 hour drive and my Mini-Me was here.
after months and months of PLEADING "say Aunt Ashley, say Aunt Ash, pleasssse" and hearing her attempt to say the dogs names, i finally bribed her with some icecubes and she said "ashhhhh". It was pretty much one of the best feelings ever. To see my little niece go from this squishy bald thing that cried all the time to a lil person that runs around my house looking for "woof woof" and "baby woof woof" and calling out "choochoo pop" and saying "i love you nana" is pretty incredible...i promise no other entry will ever have this much talk about kids. ever.again.
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